


Maybe I’m too busy being yours to fall for somebody new

by MamaWouldBeSoProud



Category: Hockey RPF
Genre: Anal Sex, Angst, Blowjobs, Breaking up and making up, Found Families, Friends to Lovers, M/M, Major Character Injury, Metric Tons of Angst, Panic Attacks, Pining, Stripper AU (sort of), Threesome - M/M/M, Voyeurism, handjobs, hands down the most self-indulgent piece of trash I have ever written, it all sounds very rough but there is a happy ending I swear, open relationship (sort of), there is so much filth and so much sappy fluff in this!!, they work at a sex club but the superfluffy kind
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-10
Updated: 2018-04-10
Packaged: 2019-04-21 05:03:33
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 14,897
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14277498
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MamaWouldBeSoProud/pseuds/MamaWouldBeSoProud
Summary: “Hey dude, you are huge!” was the first thing Tyler ever said to him with appraising eyes.Jamie is pretty sure he was completely lost from that moment on.The Bennguin sequel to “Well my heart beats at its peak, when you’re coming up to speak”, in which Jamie and Tyler fall in love, fuck, fight and eventually break up before life throws them in for a loop.





	Maybe I’m too busy being yours to fall for somebody new

**Author's Note:**

> If you found this story by googling yourself or someone you know, please stop reading now. Because you will most likely hate me if you don’t. And that would make me incredibly sad and embarrassed. So please spare us all the shame and the hate. Thanks. I am so, so sorry.
> 
>  I wrote [“Well my heart beats at its peak, when you’re coming up to speak”](https://archiveofourown.org/works/13947963) a while ago and the feedback was overwhelming. You should definitely read that story first, otherwise this one won’t make much sense to you. The timelines for the two stories overlap, but this time I concentrated on our favorite cow-eyed Canadian and his bratty little sidekick. 
> 
> Warning: Apart from one character getting into a pretty gruesome accident, there is also some gay slurs being used in this story and descriptions of homophobic bullying. It’s basically all the bullshit LGBTQ youths and adults still often have to deal with on a daily basis. I know, it pisses me off too.
> 
>  There is also a threesome sex scene that I wrote exclusively for my precious friend [bluenorth](https://archiveofourown.org/users/bluenorth). I hope you like it, girl! 
> 
> Title taken from “Do I wanna know” by the Arctic Monkeys, which fits this fic absurdly well.
> 
> All spelling errors are on me. Sorry sorry.

 “You don’t get it,” is the last thing Tyler says to Jamie as he walks out of their apartment with a bag of clothes and Gerry on a leash. “You just don’t _get_ it.”

 

It’s been eight days and twenty hours since then.

Jamie knows.

He has been staring at the clock on their microwave from his spot on the kitchen floor. He has planned to get up from there a couple of times, because he is pretty sure he is being pathetic, but he can’t really bring himself to do it. Not when his heart is a mushy pile of burning excrement. Not when this is the perfect spot for feeling thoroughly sorry for himself.

Tyler and him are very probably over.

Done.

 _Finished_.

It is only warranted that he stays here, in his stained sweatpants and with his half-full bottle of peach schnapps.

 

*

 

Jamie met Tyler on his first day at the Glitter Palace. Back then he was desperate. Desperate to get his hands on some money to help out his family. Desperate to be able to stay in college and fulfill his dream of becoming an elementary school teacher. He already waited tables, took night shifts as a janitor in the local hospital and still it wasn’t enough. It never was. So when a friend of a friend suggested the Glitter Palace to him, even Jamie with his lingering self-esteem issues was desperate enough to call the number on the card that simply said “Sully” and get himself an appointment.

 

He had been the fat kid at school. Not seriously obese, but still beefy enough to be called 'Chubbs' by everybody, even though he played baseball and hockey. He stopped with both sports at some point. His classmates chanting “Jiggly Jamie” whenever he played a game might have been a factor in that decision.

 

Ten years later and Jamie lost his baby weight, but he still wasn’t lean, still wasn’t hot. Not like Tyler, who Sully introduced him to in the locker room at the back of the club. Tyler with his abs of steel and his cute little butt and his tattoos and his laugh that was all teeth. Not like that. _Never_ like that.

“Hey dude, you are huge!” was the first thing Tyler ever said to him with appraising eyes.

Jamie is pretty sure he was completely lost from that moment on.

 

They stayed in the huge storefront window room above the bar for the first few weeks. Jerking off side by side, Tyler giggling whenever Jamie made a sound and Jamie blushing furiously and losing his boner. Geno eventually had some pretty strong words with Tyler and Tyler stopped the giggling. Weirdly, Jamie missed it.

 

“I’m sorry if I seemed mean,” Tyler told Jamie that night when they were hanging out by the bar. He pushed a shot in Jamie’s direction.

“It’s fine-” Jamie started to say, but Tyler interrupted him.

“No, it’s not. I was being a dick. And I never want to make people feel uncomfortable. But I did, and I’m sorry.”

He looked up at Jamie with puppy dog eyes and Jamie couldn’t actually say anything in reply, so he just nodded and clinked his shot glass with Tyler before they drank.

“Why did you do it?” Jamie finally asked.

Tyler looked a little sheepish.

“Why did I giggle?”

Jamie nodded.

“Um-”

Tyler scratched his neck and blushed a little. It looked adorable and Jamie kinda wanted to bite Tyler’s cheeks. He shook it off.

“Well,” Tyler finally said with a sigh. “Every time you moaned or sighed, my dick twitched in response. And that- Well that has never happened before, really…”

There was no spit left in Jamie’s mouth for him to form a response, so he simply didn’t.

 

Tyler soon migrated to the bird cage and the other smaller storefront window next to the dancefloor. He varied his partners there, sometimes he went with beautiful, Swedish Gabe, sometimes he went with Leon, the new kid from Germany. Sometimes he went with Biz, who’s dick was so huge that Jamie had to stare for a solid five minutes the first time he saw it.

“It’s okay dude,” Biz told him when he caught Jamie looking. “I have a huge dong. It’s a _big_ responsibility, but I can handle it.”

Tyler overheard them and laughed himself silly.

 

Yes, Jamie was pining. Of course he was pining! He had fallen for Tyler within the first five minutes of meeting him and now his big crush was so fucking obvious that all the other entertainers threw him looks of amused pity whenever he brought Tyler a red bull or drove him home or just sat next to him, trying not to stare _too_ adoringly at Tyler while he told some weird story about some bar he went to last night. They were often the last ones to leave, talking until late into the night about their lives and their families and hockey and movies and what the cast members of The OC were up to these days.

Jamie wasn’t stupid. He knew it was a hopeless crush. Someone like Tyler didn’t end up with someone like Jamie. Not even in the movies. Especially not in real life.

 

No, Jamie was content just sitting next to Tyler, warming himself on the glow that seemed to surround Tyler at all times and enjoying the small smiles that he handed out exclusively to Jamie. It wasn’t until Sully cornered Jamie one rainy Saturday night in fall and asked him to go to the bird cage with Tyler, that Jamie’s heart got reckless and hopeful.

“It would be great if you guys could cover that shift, because so many guys are out tonight,” Sully said. “I already asked Tyler and he said yes, so it’s up to you.”

Jamie wasn’t great with words at the best of times but now he stumbled over them so much that in the end he simply nodded.

 

“Just tell me if you don’t like something and I’ll stop,” Tyler whispered right before he kissed Jamie the very first time in that cage, heavy bass music throbbing in the air and flickering strobe lights casting a weird glow on the dancefloor.

Jamie made a small sound into Tyler’s mouth and then immediately sorta blacked out. He didn’t know what came over him, but at some point he found himself crushing Tyler to the bars of the cage, greedily groping and grabbing every inch of Tyler’s perfect body that he could reach.

“Holy _shit_ ,” Tyler groaned when Jamie latched his mouth onto Tyler’s neck and sucked a giant, obnoxious hickey into the skin there.

 

Jamie ended up blowing Tyler, his knees on the filthy floor and the gratifying weight of Tyler’s gorgeous, wonderful, shapely dick on his tongue. Jamie wasn’t proud of many things, but he was definitely proud of how good he was at giving head. He felt cum coating the back of his throat after just a few minutes and when he pulled off, Tyler looked almost cross-eyed with pleasure.

“Where the fuck did _that_ come from?” Tyler panted before he dropped down next to Jamie and reached for Jamie’s cock. Jamie was already stroking himself, but Tyler batted away his hand.

“Don’t be selfish,” Tyler said and leaned in to kiss his own jizz out of Jamie’s mouth. “Let me get my hands on the good stuff too.”

 

After that, they ended up in the cage or the couple’s window a lot. Sully just smiled a tiny little smile when they handed in their shift lists and said nothing. But Jamie could have sworn Sully looked just like the cat that got the canary.

The first time Tyler sank to his knees in front of Jamie in the storefront window next to the dance floor, Jamie almost gave him a facial the second Tyler pulled his boxers down. Another time, Tyler kept moaning around Jamie’s dick so much, that Jamie was sure he was being mocked. But when he finally came down Tyler’s throat and hurriedly sank down to take care of Tyler too, he found him already sticky and spent.

“Whoops” Tyler said with a giggle and Jamie’s heart beat a bit out of sync for a while.

 

Still, Jamie was pining and Tyler was still out of his league. It was Geno who finally had enough.

“ _Most_ stupid, both of you” he growled one night in the locker room.

Tyler and Jamie were in the middle of one of their teasing ‘arguments’ about Canucks versus Leafs that had escalated into a tickle fight and both looked up in surprise when Geno appeared in front of them.

“Are you little children? You pull pigtails in playground? No?”

Jamie and Tyler looked confused, first at each other and then at Geno, who sighed heavily.

 

“Tyler, I’m think Jamie would like to ask you for dinner. Tomorrow, 7pm? You have time?”

Jamie’s face burned and he immediately dropped his hands that were still on Tyler’s hips. He knew his crush must have been obvious, but for Geno to _betray_ him like this, call him out like this right in front of Tyler- It was just a real dick move. He chanced a glance at Tyler, who to his surprise also blushed and seemed to avoid Jamie’s gaze.

 

“Sorry,” Tyler mumbled once Geno had heaved another theatrical sigh and wandered off.

Jamie raked a hand through his own hair and looked down. Great. Now Tyler was apologizing for not being attracted to Jamie. Of course he wasn’t. Jamie _knew_ that. If Geno had just shut up about it and not made Jamie’s crush so hard for Tyler to ignore and-

“I didn’t know my crush on you was that obvious” Tyler said and Jamie stopped breathing.

 

“Your crush-” he finally stuttered out, “ _You_ \- On _me_?”

Tyler looked up with drawn eyebrows.

“Yeah. As I said: sorry. You don’t have to be a dick about it.”

Tyler turned around and Jamie couldn’t have that. For _once_ in his life he would have to open his mouth and say the right words and not make a fool of himself and let good things slip through his fingers.

He grabbed Tyler by the arm and yanked him back.

 

“I didn’t know you have a crush on me. _I_ have a crush on _you_. And I know you are out of my league and I am not really all that hot, but if you want, if you _really_ want, I would love to take you out to dinner tomorrow and also on every other day until we die of old age.”

Jamie had said all that in one big, awkward rush, desperate to finish his sentence before his courage ran out. The locker room was silent now, all eyes on them. Jamie could feel a blush take over his entire face and chest. Tyler just gaped at him with his mouth hanging open. The seconds ticked on. Jamie felt a little like spontaneously combusting into flames.

 

And then, the most magical little smile appeared on Tyler’s face. One of the small smiles he only gave to Jamie. But it transformed, slowly, gradually, into this big thing that was bright enough to light up even the darkest corners of Jamie’s mind.

“Sounds like a plan,” Tyler said before he kissed Jamie to catcalls from all the other entertainers.

“Hah, I give it two weeks,” PK called over teasingly.

“I’ll take that bet,” Biz shouted back.

“Let’s prove ‘em wrong,” Tyler whispered into Jamie’s mouth.

 

*

 

They had their first official date at a hole in the wall in downtown Pittsburgh that Biz had recommended to them. The pizza was awesome, the beer was cheap and their date- well, it consisted mostly of serious talk. Even weirder - it was _Tyler_ who started it.

 

“Listen,” he said to Jamie the minute they had given the waiter their order, “I like you and I usually mess up everything, so I’m trying a new tactic that I call ‘brutal honesty’. You think you could handle it?”

Jamie blinked at him but then smiled tentatively. All in, heart first.

“Hit me.”

Tyler nodded.

“Alright. So I have never been in a real relationship before. I never wanted to and even when I did, I usually cheated on the guy and it all went down in flames. I don’t want to do that this time. So we’ll need a rulebook or something.”

Jamie took a couple of sips from his glass of beer but nodded for Tyler to go on.

 

“Okay, so, I want to date you. And I want to call you my boyfriend. And I also want you to fuck me until I can’t walk, because we haven’t done that yet and I jerk off exclusively to mental images of your huge cock these days-”

Jamie briefly wondered if you could pass out from blushing violently. His body was definitely trying to give it a go. He also had a lot of beer currently dribbling down his t-shirt.

 

Tyler soldiered on while handing Jamie a napkin for the beer he had spluttered down his front.

“So I want to be your boyfriend, but I still want to do stuff with other dudes. Or- Well, I want that freedom. I’m not sure whether or not I actually want to follow through, but I want the _option_. I want things to not go to shit, when I do stuff with others.”

Jamie swallowed heavily.

Their pizza arrived, but he suddenly didn’t really feel hungry anymore. Tyler looked at him miserably, chewing his lip.

 

“Too much ‘brutal honesty’, eh?”

Jamie shook his head.

“No- No, it’s okay. That’s how you feel, you should be able to tell me” he answered.

“But now I made you fucking sad, and I don’t _want_ that,” Tyler said with a sigh.

The pizza still stood, untouched, between them. Jamie swallowed again.

“My mom used to say that relationships are about compromising, so- so, maybe we could do that?”

Tyler tilted his head slightly, so Jamie plowed on.

“Like- you get to do, um- _stuff_ with other guys, but- no actual fucking. Only _I_ get to do that” Jamie said. The thought of finally getting his dick into Tyler was almost enough to give him a boner right there in the restaurant. Jamie took another sip of beer.

 

“And-” he continued, “I want to be there when you do stuff with other guys. Not because I don’t trust you, but- like, I need to know if I can _actually_ handle it. Maybe I can’t, but then you deserve to know straight away.”

Jamie looked everywhere but at Tyler’s face while he spoke. When he finally dared glancing at Tyler he was surprised to see a small, considering smile on Tyler’s face.

“I think,” Tyler finally said, “I think you just got yourself a deal.”

They grinned at each other like loons for the rest of the date.

 

“One thing though,” Tyler added on their way back to Jamie’s place. “These rules we made, they go both ways. You don’t get to fuck anybody but me. And when some other guy gets to suck you off or get his hands all over your gorgeous body, I wanna _watch_.”

This time, Jamie definitely did get a boner at Tyler’s words. He was glad it was so dark and that the streets were deserted.

 

They went back to Jamie’s place, already making out in the elevator up. By the time they reached Jamie’s bedroom they were already very much naked, sweaty and panting.

“You’re gonna fuck me, right?” Tyler asked in between kisses. “I want it so bad. I can’t wait any longer. _Fuck_ , Jamie, fuck me.”

Jamie groaned, pushed Tyler onto the bed and almost tore the bedside table to pieces in his search for condoms and lube.

 

Having Tyler lying on his bed, legs spread and two of Jamie’s fingers in Tyler’s clenching hole was what Jamie imagined paradise must be like. Like God had looked down at Jamie and said “Sorry dude, for giving you a body you hate and a mind that sometimes works too slowly, but I’m gonna make it up to you. Here’s an awesome hot dude that will inexplicably let you do stuff to him. You’re welcome!”

“Fuck, Jamie, fuck fuck _fuck,_ ” Tyler whispered when Jamie twisted his fingers slightly inside of him. “Don’t stop!”

“I won’t” Jamie whispered back and kissed the insides of Tyler’s shaking thighs.

 

He did have to stop eventually. But only to tear open the condom, suit up and then sink into the scolding heat of Tyler’s body. By the time he bottomed out, he was dizzy with ecstasy. It was like going from agnosticism to evangelism in one single stroke of his dick. Like a prayer to the sex gods. He pulled almost all the way out and then slammed back in, marveling at the way Tyler’s head was thrown back into the pillow, the way his hands were fisted into the sheets.

“You are so beautiful,” Jamie blurted out. But before the shame could hit him, Tyler had already pulled him down to kiss him.

“Tell me more,” Tyler whispered and so Jamie did.

 

He told Tyler how pretty he was, how good he felt. How perfectly he was taking Jamie’s cock. How much Jamie wanted to fuck him bare at some point, mark him up, make sure everybody knew that Tyler belonged to him. It went from adoring to sappy to fucking filthy in roughly four minutes and by the end of it Tyler was a shaking, moaning, twitching _mess_. When he came, Jamie concentrated on the way Tyler’s hole contracted around his dick and followed him over the edge, shouting broken sounds into the stale bedroom air.

 

*

 

They said their 'I love you's after a month of dating. Nobody had planned it, it just slipped out. Jamie had fully expected to be the first one to say it, but Tyler beat him to it. One night, when they were sitting on Jamie’s couch, Tyler’s feet in his lap and a warm blanket covering them both, Jamie told Tyler why he wanted to become a teacher.

“You know, I’m, um- I’m not that great with words. But kids- they never seem to mind. They don’t laugh at me when I stumble over a sentence. And- and I like that. Makes me feel like I’m less of a joke.”

When he looked up, Tyler was looking at him with a very peculiar expression on his face.

“I love you” he said and Jamie’s heart stopped beating for a second.

 

Jamie was about to open his mouth to tell Tyler that he loved him too, loved him a _pathetic_ amount really, but Tyler was already straddling him and bowing down to kiss Jamie softly on the mouth.

“I know” Tyler whispered. “You don’t have to say it back. I can see it in your look. Relax, you’re good.”

And Jamie felt good. For the first time ever he felt like he could hold a speech in front of the fucking United Nations if he had to.

 

The thing about Tyler was, that he was usually loud, bubbly, crackling around the edges. One time, he woke up Jamie in the middle of the night.

“Jamie, wake up, wake _up_!”

Jamie just groaned into his pillow.

“Listen, Jamie, I just realized something! Do you know that song ‘Candyman’ by Christina Aguilera?”

Jamie actually had to lift his head to stare at Tyler incredulously.

“Dude, it’s 4am!”

Tyler just waved his hand at him.

“Whatever. Jamie, I just realized - that song is about _me_!”

Jamie blinked.

“What?”

And at that Tyler started to sing off-key.

“He had tattoos up and down his arm. There's nothing more dangerous than a boy with charm. He's a one stop shop, makes the panties drop, he's a sweet talkin' sugar coated candy man.”

Jamie almost asphyxiated from laughing so hard at Tyler’s gleeful face.

 

But there were other nights, too. Nights when Jamie would wake from a sniffling Tyler, trying to creep back into bed after quietly crying in the bathroom. When Jamie had to wrap his shaking boyfriend in a hug and wait him out until Tyler told him what was wrong. Usually Tyler had had a nightmare. A flashback about being bullied in high school. About kids calling Tyler ‘cocksucker’ and ‘fag’ and waterboarding him in toilet bowls.

 

Or about his time in Boston. When he got fired from his job at a hotel for missing his breakfast shift and then had to loan money from some bad people. If it hadn’t been for Sully, Tyler would have ended up at the bottom of Boston harbour probably. Sometimes Tyler had straight up panic attacks and Jamie would wake to him accidentally knocking down something in his panic and fear. Jamie was glad those nights got more rare the longer they were together. Tyler - _his_ Tyler - should never have to be this miserable.

 

*

 

They celebrated their first New Year’s Eve at the Glitter Palace, drinking shots and dancing on the crowded dance floor. Their kiss at midnight was sweet and chaste and full of promise. Jamie knew that Tyler hated being tied down and feeling locked in. But in that moment, when it was just the two of them underneath the winter sky in the garden behind the Glitter Palace, Jamie felt safe and at peace.

 

Not even half an hour later a very drunk Leon started kissing Tyler right in front of him and Jamie was lost at sea again. He was no idiot, he knew - knew in his _gut_ \- that Tyler would never be happy with a guy like him forever. He would get bored or realize that he was way out of Jamie’s league. So Jamie tried to loosen his grip on Tyler’s hand to make sure Tyler knew that he could go and bury his fingers in Leon’s dark blond hair. But Tyler just kept holding on to Jamie, even pulling him in. And Jamie went, because Jamie went everywhere Tyler told him to.

 

He didn’t know why Leon stopped kissing Tyler and tilted his head towards Jamie instead. Maybe he felt bad for Jamie. Or he wanted to pretend that he found Jamie attractive as well. Or he wanted to put on a bit of a show for Tyler. But when Leon’s lips found Jamie’s, Jamie kissed back. He was dimly aware of Tyler’s hand on his ass and Tyler’s mouth on his neck. He vaguely registered all three of them slowly making their way to the dark room at some point. And when Leon dropped on his knees to suck Tyler off, Jamie couldn’t keep his eyes from both of them.

 

He had expected to be jealous, to be nauseous and feel like crap. And those feelings were definitely there, just not at full force. It was more like a soft echo of them, lingering in the back of Jamie’s conscience. The dominating emotion in his gut was actually roaring arousal at the sight of Tyler panting wetly into Jamie’s chest.

“God, look at you” Jamie murmured into Tyler’s ear, alcohol having made his tongue and brain pliable. “You look like a fucking _God_ , having guys on their knees for you.”

Tyler moaned in response and fisted his hands in Jamie’s shirt as he came.

 

Leon wiped his mouth with the back of his hand, grinned up at them both and casually turned to open Jamie’s zipper. Jamie had so not anticipated this and was kinda frozen in place. Leon looked up again for confirmation and gave Jamie a shy little smile.

“Saved the biggest piece for last” he said and winked. “No offense, Seggy.”

“None taken” Tyler said with a giggle before turning his face up at Jamie to kiss him, while Leon swallowed Jamie’s dick down in one huge gulp.

 

As inappropriate as it was, but that night Jamie wished _fervently_ that his chubby, closeted 16-year-old self could have seen him in that moment. In the dark room of a gay night club, with the most gorgeous man sucking hickey after hickey into his neck and another beautiful man on his knees in front of him, moaning around his dick like _Jamie_ was the one doing _him_ a favor here.

He knew it wasn’t real. Knew that they were humoring him. That Tyler maybe liked him for his kindness or his adoration and that Leon was drunk and probably not that picky anyways. But for the moment Jamie let himself believe. Believe that he was right where he belonged.

 

*

 

Time moved on at the Glitter Palace. New people came in and some others left. Mitch and Auston started when their old DJ Phil the Thrill went to Toronto to work at his boyfriend’s hot dog restaurant. Chara became their new bouncer and Willy and Kappy came on as entertainers. Their barkeeper Alex got two new helpers behind the bar, Tom and Mike, who pretended to be just best friends who also ‘weren’t into that whole couples thing’. Jamie and Gabe made a bet how long it would take Alex to get them together. Jamie said two months, Gabe said three. After not even three weeks, Alex collected both their money while Tom and Mike shyly held hands in the background.

“You forget my big Russian soul. I _love_ love. Can’t stand two idiots who not see what is in front of them.”

Gabe actually paid Geno five bucks to teach him some Russian curse words, especially for the occasion.

 

Tyler still lived with Sully, even though he spent more and more time at Jamie’s place.

“Move in with me” Jamie asked him one night over dinner, his heartbeat up in his throat and his palms sweaty.

Tyler shook his head.

“I need to know what I am doing with my life first. I need a plan. Then I’ll move in.”

 

That night in bed, Jamie asked him what he _wanted_ to do with his life. Tyler shrugged a little helplessly.

“I quit high school because I was being bullied, but to be honest, I’m pretty sure I was too stupid for it anyways.”

“You are _not_ stupid!” Jamie answered with vehemence.

Tyler’s eyes were huge in the light that streamed in from the street.

“What do you want to do?” Jamie asked again.

“I-” Tyler hesitantly started, “I always wanted to be a chef, but-”

“Then you’ll be a chef. I’ll help you” Jamie said.

 

Tyler enrolled in classes to get his high school diploma ten days later. Two days after that he moved his stuff into Jamie’s - now _their_ \- apartment.

 

*

 

Their first fight wasn’t really a fight. Or it was, but it ended with spectacular orgasms and a mental breakthrough, so Jamie was inclined to think it was actually the opposite of a fight. A win of sorts.

 

It sorta started with an off-hand remark Jamie made at the locker room one night. When PK commented on Jamie’s huge ass and beefy thighs and Jamie answered with some self-deprecating comeback that made PK laugh but Tyler’s eyebrows knit together. A couple of days later, Willy talked about an old episode of How I Met Your Mother he had watched and their theory that every relationship consists of a reacher and a settler.

“One person settles for the other while the other person reaches out of their league” Willy explained.

Jamie had nodded and slung an arm over Tyler’s shoulder.

“I agree and for the record - I am _very_ fine with it.”

Again, the others laughed but Tyler frowned at Jamie.

 

The straw that broke the camel’s back was a conversation in their kitchen on a night off, during which Jamie stuttered his way through a recap of a documentary he had seen.

“Dude, I love you, but I have _no_ fucking idea what you are talking about” Tyler giggled after a couple of minutes of stumbling, stuttering nonsense from Jamie.

It was good natured teasing and Jamie genuinely laughed along.

“Well,” he finally said. “It’s a good thing I am this great at talking, because you sure as shit didn’t pick me for my raging good looks.”

 

Once more, Tyler’s face transformed into a frown.

“Why do you always do that?” he asked Jamie, suddenly serious.

“Do what?”

“Talk like _that_ about yourself.”

Jamie sighed and raked a hand through his hair.

“Come on, Tyler, we both know that I’m not nearly as hot as you are.”

Tyler straight up scowled at Jamie.

“Yes you are! _I_ think so at least.”

 

Jamie didn’t easily get angry, but he could feel it bubbling under his skin then. If he hated anything more than people lying to his face, it was being humored. Being _pitied_.

“Stop that,” he hissed at Tyler. “Don’t bullshit me, okay? I know I’m not that great looking, and I’m okay with it. But don’t try and play du-”

“Would you fucking _stop_?” Tyler suddenly yelled at him.

Jamie blinked at Tyler, surprised.

“I can’t fucking take it anymore, seriously!” Tyler shouted and grabbed Jamie by the wrist. “I will show you and you better fucking shut up.”

Jamie could have stood his ground, could have resisted. But of course he didn’t. He followed Tyler willingly to their bed room.

 

“This is ridicu-” he started saying as Tyler tied his hands to the headboard with a tie.

“Shut your fucking gorgeous mouth” Tyler snapped at him, before removing Jamie’s boxers and then tying his feet to the bed posts with two other ties.

Jamie was pretty sure that at least one of the ties had been a present from his nana. He tried to ignore _that_ fun little fact nugget.

When all of his limbs were tied down and he was spread out naked on the sheets, Tyler sat back to watch him. Jamie never liked being scrutinized like that and he felt the urge to squirm and avoid Tyler’s gaze, but Tyler just looked at him with steady eyes while he removed his own clothes.

 

“For the record,” Tyler finally said, kneeling in between Jamie’s legs, one hand softly stroking up and down Jamie’s left thigh. “I love you for so many reasons.”

Jamie tried to even out his breathing. The urge to look away in discomfort was overwhelming, but Tyler held his gaze firmly.

“I love you because you are kind and funny and smart. You listen to my weird stories and calm me down when I am going off the rails. You hold me when I have a panic attack and laugh at my jokes, even if they are _really_ bad.”

Jamie let a wet little chuckle out of his mouth. Tyler still looked at him.

 

“You’re the reason I’ll be a chef one day. You make me so happy it fucking scares me to death sometimes. Because I’m terrified you’ll realize that you could do much, much better than Tyler the screw up from Brampton, Ontario.”

“Tyler, what the- _you_ could do so much better than _me_!” Jamie interjected fiercely but Tyler gave him a little slap on the inside of his thigh and Jamie yelped.

“Shut up, it is my turn to say nice stuff for once!”

Tyler’s eyes were burning, his gaze boring into Jamie.

 

“You are the best thing that ever happened to me and I will cut every bitch that tries to take you away from me. But-” Tyler paused for a second and took a deep breath, “even if you were the worst person ever, with a horrible personality and like- preferred cats over dogs or thought the Bruins were a great hockey team or something-”

Jamie snorted a little.

“Even if you were a complete dick - I would still really, _really_ want to fuck you!”

Tyler’s gaze was meaningful now and Jamie swallowed heavily.

“I would still want to fuck you, because you are seriously hot, dude. Okay? So. Fucking. _Hot_.”

 

And at that, Tyler bent down to place a kiss in the middle of Jamie’s belly.

“Like this belly,” he murmured into Jamie’s skin. “It’s so soft but underneath there are these strong muscles and it is always warm on my back when you spoon me.”

Tyler moved a little further down to where Jamie’s dick was definitely starting to get into it. Tyler ignored it and traced patterns with his tongue over the skin on Jamie’s lower belly. Jamie tensed. There were stretch marks still visible, even after all these years.

And Tyler seemed to read his mind because he traced his fingertips over them.

“I love these marks” he whispered, so quietly that Jamie almost didn’t hear. “They look like you got into a fight with a grizzly and you fucking _won_.”

He pressed a small kiss to every single mark, before moving on.

 

Tyler kissed his way down to Jamie’s thighs, marveled at their strength, raked his nails up and down Jamie’s chest and told him how much he loved to rest his head there. He licked Jamie’s biceps and sucked bruises into Jamie’s shoulders and neck, before finally, blessedly closing his mouth around Jamie’s cock.

“Fuuuck,” Jamie hissed out while he unconsciously pulled at the tie around his wrists.

“This fucking dick” Tyler murmured while giving the head little kitten licks. “I fucking _dream_ about it. Sometimes I think about you just ramming it into me on the way to work, and I get hard right there in the passenger seat.”

Jamie moaned.

“Fuck, Jamie” Tyler whispered. “You have the best cock in the world. So _big_ and thick and just- perfect!”

 

Realistically it took Tyler maybe a couple of minutes to open himself up while blabbering on and on about how good Jamie’s dick was. But it felt like at least two years to Jamie. There were beads of sweat on his forehead now and something that felt like an itch behind his balls. When Tyler was finally ready and pulled his fingers out, he leaned forwards to kiss Jamie on the mouth.

“I got tested a week ago. I know you got tested last month and we haven’t been with anyone else. You wanna?”

It took Jamie a second to fully comprehend what Tyler was asking but when he finally got it, he almost came on the spot.

“Fuck yes,” he breathed and Tyler nodded once, squirted some more lube on Jamie’s dick, scooted up quickly and sank down on him in one smooth glide.

 

Jamie couldn’t really do anything because he was still bound to the bed, but the sight of Tyler fucking himself on his dick, riding him, head thrown back and his neck exposed was almost too much to handle. Every time Tyler pushed himself down, there were small breathy sounds escaping his mouth along with an occasional curse or a dry sob.

“Fuck, Jamie, you feel so fucking good” Tyler moaned and sped up when Jamie could only groan in response.

“Nobody has ever fucked me like this” he continued babbling. “ _Nobody_. You- just- you’re so good, so good for me. Fuck-”

Tyler’s hands were on Jamie’s chest now, scrabbling for leverage as he pushed himself down harder and faster and Jamie tried to hold out but he couldn’t and then he was screaming and throwing his own head back into the pillows while Tyler writhed and trashed above him, spurting hot come across Jamie’s chest.

 

Afterwards, when their breaths and pulses were back to normal and Tyler had untied Jamie and kissed the angry red welts on his wrists, they laid in bed together.

“Did it work?” Tyler mumbled sleepily into Jamie’s skin.

“Huh?” Jamie mumbled back.

“Do you believe me now?” Tyler lifted his head to look at Jamie with searching eyes. “That I find you fucking sexy and _literally_ get a boner for you at least ten times a day?”

Jamie blushed but held Tyler’s gaze. He lifted his hand to card a few fingers through Tyler’s hair.

“I’m starting to,” he whispered.

Tyler looked at him for a second and then nodded.

“Okay, that’s a start I guess.”

 

They lay in easy silence for a few minutes longer.

“When I-” Tyler started after a while but then fell silent. “When I- do stuff with other guys, that’s _not_ about me not wanting you. You get that, right?”

Jamie swallowed and looked up at the ceiling.

“Yeah, I guess,” he answered quietly.

“It’s about me wanting you and also wanting others, but that doesn’t mean that I don’t like you enough or some shit,” Tyler continued. “It just means that I’m a greedy bitch. Who loves you. And that one time with Leon- that was so fucking _hot_ , seeing you like this.”

Jamie blushed even harder at the memory, but his traitorous cock was what actually gave him away.

 

Tyler lifted his head in surprise as Jamie fattened up against Tyler’s thigh. There was a sly little grin on his face.

“Huh. Seems like your friend here agrees with me, eh?”

Jamie laughed, embarrassed.

“Oh shut up.”

“Make me!” Tyler answered.

And _that_ was probably Jamie’s favorite challenge.

 

*

 

Jordie met Tyler after five months of dating and of course they got on like a house on fire.

“Well done, Chubbs,” Jordie murmured into Jamie’s ear when they hugged goodbye. “Keep that one around, eh?”

“I’m doing my best” Jamie answered quietly and gave Jordie another pat on the back.

“Are you guys talking about me?” came Tyler’s petulant voice from a few feet away and Jamie snorted.

 

At the Palace they graduated to the porn bed when two other entertainers left. Sully asked them into his office to discuss it and make sure they were okay with it.

“It means fewer shifts per night and usually way more tips.”

Jamie looked at Tyler, who grinned.

“Well it’s not exactly a hardship to get fucked by my boyfriend,” Tyler said. Sully laughed while Jamie blushed.

 

At home, in the privacy of their own bedroom, they had a wide range of stuff they did. Sometimes it got really kinky, really fast. Sometimes they smoked a blunt and had long, stoned afternoon fucks in a beam of sunshine coming in through the window. Sometimes they straight up ‘made love’ with interlocked fingers, lots of eye contact and whispered confessions of adoration.

On the porn bed - they simply _fucked_ like rabbits.

 

It was pretty straight forward. Right before they went to work, Tyler would put in a big anal plug, to stretch himself out a bit. His squirming on the passenger seat drove Jamie out of his mind with want the first few times Tyler did it. When Jamie still managed to keep the car on the road and not bust a nut at the steering wheel, they made it to the Glitter Palace and got ready for the porn bed. Tyler usually went to the bathroom to take the plug out and apply some more lube. Some days Jamie went with him to ‘help’, but it turned out they had _way_ less self control than they thought and so Jamie had to stay away from the bathroom altogether. Firstly because Willy once walked in on them fucking over the sink and screamed like an 8-year-old girl, and secondly because they weren’t 21 anymore and couldn’t get it up that quickly afterwards.

 

Once they were on the bed, it was always the same routine. Some kissing, some groping and then Jamie would grab Tyler’s hips from behind and pound into him until they both came. In the beginning Jamie tried to ignore the people around the bed, their lusting looks and their semi-hard cocks straining against zippers. But after a while he started getting off on their jealousy. When he fucked into Tyler’s tight little butt, he could see the envy etched into their faces. How they wished it was them who got to make Tyler yelp into the pillows, moaning and twitching around Jamie’s cock.

“Fuck, Jamie, fuck me _harder,_ ” Tyler begged and Jamie could see one of the guys around the bed desperately palming himself over his jeans.

 

One night at the bar a customer approached Jamie.

“Sorry, this is probably so fucking creepy, but I wonder whether you and that guy from the bed- Are you guys together?”

Jamie smiled. This wasn’t anything new. _Everybody_ wanted a piece of Tyler. Jamie couldn’t even blame them.

“Yes, he’s my boyfriend,” he replied. “But we have a deal, so-” Jamie trailed off. If the guy wanted to try his luck with Tyler, he could.

Predictably the dude lit up like a Christmas tree.

“So I could buy you a drink and see where that takes us?” he asked Jamie with a wink.

Jamie choked on his beer. The handjob the guy gave him half an hour later and under the watchful eyes of Tyler was still pretty damn good.

 

*

 

They were close with most of the guys from the club, which probably wasn’t surprising. Jerking off next to each other gave you a certain kind of camaraderie you didn’t get from working in the same office or something. But Jamie and Tyler only started getting closer to Geno when Sid started at the palace. Even the first night he was there, he made pathetic googly eyes at their tall Russian colleague.

“I wanted to offer him a napkin to wipe away the drool a couple of times tonight” Tyler said on their way home.

“Yep, he’s in trouble alright” Jamie nodded back.

 

Tyler’s birthday rolled around a day later. Jamie woke him up early and drove him an hour out of town.

“Honestly, if you’re taking me hiking or some shit, I’ll dump your sorry ass” Tyler grumbled from the passenger seat, sipping his coffee. Jamie just grinned and kept driving until they got to the little farm house he had visited a few weeks before.

“The hell, Benny?” Tyler said.

Then there was the unmistakable sound of puppies barking and Tyler dropped his travel mug.

 

“I can’t believe this” Tyler whispered reverently, when the breeder placed the straw colored puppy in his arms.

“Happy Birthday, babe,” Jamie said and snapped a picture of an awestruck Tyler and a yawning puppy.

“I can’t fucking believe you!” Tyler whispered again, his eyes full of awe and surprise and love and happy tears.

They very nearly squashed their new puppy when their kissing got a bit out of control a few seconds later.

 

Having a tiny puppy in the house was simultaneously the best and the worst thing Jamie had ever experienced. Before he bought Tyler the puppy, he had already asked their college student neighbor if she could watch it when they were off at work. She had squealed very enthusiastically and now had approximately 300 pictures of their dog falling asleep on her couch on her phone.

 

Tyler was surprisingly good at house training Gerry - who was named after Gerry James, who apparently played for the Leafs at some point - but Jamie still woke up many nights to a yawning Tyler crawling back into bed and shoving his freezing toes between Jamie’s calves.

“Took the little one out for a spin” he would snuffle into Jamie’s shoulder.

Jamie chuckled and pulled Tyler closer, already halfway back into sleep.

“Good practice for when we have kids” Tyler mumbled and then immediately started snoring.

Jamie’s eyes snapped open. _What_ the fuck did Tyler just say?

It took him longer than warranted to fall back asleep with his heart that sounded like wild horses running away in a panic.

 

Speaking of panic: Tyler and Jamie took care of Sid when he had a melt down at the Glitter Palace one night. Sid came rushing into the locker room looking like death and sprinting for the toilet. No matter how many people mistook Tyler for superficial and flighty, Jamie knew that his Tyler was one of the most observant and caring people in the world. So it came as no surprise to him that Tyler got up from the couch immediately to check on Sid. Jamie walked in on them on the bathroom floor a few minutes later.

“Can you get him a blanket?” Tyler mouthed while patting a shaking Sid on the back.

Jamie got a blanket and some water and then sat with them until Sid felt good enough to get up and back into his clothes.

“He’s sleeping on our couch tonight,” Jamie said in a low voice to Tyler and Tyler gave him a fond smile and a quick kiss.

“Yes, that’s probably for the best.”

 

They all had money on Sid and Geno. Alex had started the pool, being side-eyed heavily by Gabe.

“If you pull crap like with Wilso and Latts over there, I am telling your husband about your gambling habit!” he threatened.

“ _Gambling_? You speak crazy, Gabe my friend!” Alex answered with the most innocent expression on his face.

Tyler giggled into Jamie’s shoulder before they all put 10 dollars into a cocktail glass that went on the highest shelf behind the bar.

 

Jamie’s parents still had very little money, but the death of a wealthy granduncle and the following inheritance made things considerably easier. Their second Christmas, they came to visit him and Tyler.

“I like him” his mom whispered into Jamie’s ear one night, right before they all went to bed.

“Thanks mom” Jamie whispered back.

“I love your parents” Tyler told him very quietly when they lay in bed a few minutes later. “I wish I had parents like that too.”

“Well, now you have” Jamie said before snapping his mouth shut, panic rising in his chest. This was too much. This would be the thing that scared Tyler away from him. This would drive Tyler off into the arms of another, more handsome guy. Tyler hated being tied down. Tyler hated feeling stuck. Tyler hated hated _hated_ that.

“Yeah, I guess I do” Tyler said with a content little yawn, before wrapping himself into Jamie’s arms and pushing his butt into Jamie’s crotch. “G’night, baby” he said.

 

When Sid and Geno finally walked into the locker room holding hands, it was - unsurprisingly - Alex who won their betting money.

“You crooked piece of _shit_!” Gabe yelled in mock outrage, while Alex cackled wildly. Then he served them his newest drink concoction called ‘The Two-Headed Monster’.

“Not to be a bitch about stuff,” Tyler said, “but why didn’t Benny and I get a drink named after us when we got together?”

“Because there was no entertaining drama with you two” Andre said. “Nobody beat anybody up, nobody had epic meltdowns. Just two annoyingly hot people getting it on isn’t exactly exciting!”

“Speak for yourself” Jamie said before pulling Tyler closer, mind still reeling around the phrase ‘ _two_ annoyingly hot people’.

 

“No, Tyler is right” Mike said. “I’ll create a drink for you guys.”

The ‘ _Bennguin_ ’ - “What a bullshit name!” Biznasty cackled before downing it in one huge gulp - premiered a few nights later. Apparently Mike had tried to mix something blue - for Tyler’s dedication for the Leafs - with lemon juice, because Jamie drank a lot of tea with lemon in it during the winter.

The result was a deeply green cocktail.

“Is failure” Alex said, shaking his head.

“Hey, don’t talk about our signature couple’s drink like that!” Tyler yelped. “It’s not a failure. It’s the opposite of a failure. This is a victory drink! In _victory green_! Get stuffed, you angry Russian!”

Jamie still thought the cocktail tasted great even after it had come out through his nose during his ensuing laughing fit.

 

Tyler took his final high school exams a year and a half after they got together and passed with flying colors. Jamie took him on a mini break to the coast, where they ate lobster and watched Gerry jump around in the waves. One night they went out to some bar, where a cute European backpacker made eyes at Tyler.

“You can, if you want to” Jamie said, nudging Tyler slightly with his foot.

Tyler looked over to the guy with a tiny frown and then shook his head.

“Nah, I just want to hang with you tonight. I- I mean, if that’s okay.”

Jamie immediately took him back to their cabin by the beach to show him just exactly _how_ okay that was with him.

 

When Jamie passed his final exam, Tyler cooked him an insane three-course-meal before sucking him off on the couch. Jamie privately thought they were acing this couples thing, but then again - he had just come so hard he whited out for a second at the end. Tyler truly was _incredibly_ talented with his tongue.

“Did you find everything to your satisfaction tonight, sir?” he asked Jamie when he crawled up into his lap, Jamie’s cum still smeared across his lips.

“How do I fucking deserve you?” Jamie panted while sneaking his hand down into Tyler’s pants to jerk him off.

“Dunno” Tyler moaned as Jamie wrapped his hand around his cock. “But you do. You _really_ do. Oh fuck.”

 

They both kept working at the Glitter Palace for a while. Jamie got the offer to teach at a fancy private school downtown, while Tyler got accepted into culinary school. But they had a few months till then, and still a lot of tuition and other crap to pay. Jamie once tried to bring up the topic of Tyler probably staying at the Palace during his time at culinary school, while Jamie had to stop working at the Palace.

“You know,” Jamie told him, “when I’m not there a lot and you are- I mean, that rule we have about the other one having to be there when we do stuff with other guys- I’d be okay if you wanted to relax that rule a bit. Like, if you wanted to jerk someone off but I’m not around - if you tell me about it after, I’d be cool with that.”

 

Tyler looked at him with scrunched up eyebrows.

“Why are you telling me that?”

“Um- well, because I wanna- Like, it would be easier for you, if-”

“Do you not trust me to keep it in my pants for three nights a week?” Tyler asked. And now he was definitely pissed. Jamie could hear it in his voice.

“No, that’s not-”

“You know what, I think Gerry needs another walk” Tyler said and stood up abruptly. “When I get back, we _won’t_ talk about this again, alright?”

Jamie just sat there, dinner still half eaten on the table before him, when the front door closed behind Tyler.

 

Sid and Geno moved in together soon after. Exactly nobody was surprised and they all helped carrying boxes and assembling IKEA furniture. Sully turned up with a beer keg, which was hilarious and very sweet at the same time. Jamie was pretty sure he saw Sid wipe a tear from his eyes.

“When you think they will have first baby?” Alex asked when a few of them sat around the fire in their back garden. “Anybody want to bet?”

“No!” Gabe shouted and shook his beer glass angrily at Alex. “No more betting until you admit that you are cheating!”

Everyone broke into laughter as Alex lifted his hands in mock innocence.

“Me? Cheating? You wound me, Gabriel!”

Nicky rolled his eyes fondly at his husband and got up to get more beer.

“He totally _does_ cheat though” he murmured at Jamie, when he passed him.

 

Jamie had helped Sid buy the ring for Geno.

“Are you fucking serious?” was his first reaction when Sid told him and Sid nodded with a lopsided grin, while a blush crept up his neck.

“I’m happy for you, man,” Jamie said and then they had to awkwardly hug it out over their diner table, almost spilling Sid’s soda.

“If I actually suck it up and ask him, we’ll even beat you and Tyler to the punch!” Sid said with a giggle.

Jamie grinned.

“Don’t worry, you don’t even have to hurry up for that. I don’t think Tyler is the marrying type.”

 

It was meant to come out as a breezy statement. And Jamie thought he had actually managed to sound easygoing and aloof. But Sid still frowned at him.

“You sure about that?”

Jamie blinked at him.

I mean-” Sid continued, “has he actually ever _said_ he didn’t want to marry?”

“Um-” Jamie said, blinking some more. “Well, I think that’s something he doesn’t need to say. Come on, can you imagine Tyler being superserious for life? Like- Mr. and Mr. Benn-Seguin?”

 

The second Jamie said it, he knew in his heart that _that_ was exactly what he wanted. Having Tyler by his side, forever and ever until they both died of old age, holding hands like in that supersad movie with Ryan Gosling and the ginger chick. He also knew that it wasn’t going to happen. Tyler was so good, so wonderfully awesome and sweet, kind and funny and insanely good-looking. He wanted Jamie because Jamie meant stability and security. Something that Tyler craved after years and years of horrible uncertainty and running from one bad experience to the other. Once Tyler’s heart was fully mended however, he would grow tired of him. And he would leave, or force Jamie to leave him. It would crush Jamie and Jamie had a tiny, icy part of his brain waiting for this catastrophe to happen any day now.

 

“For what it’s worth, I actually _can_ imagine that. Pretty well, to be totally honest with you” Sid said before waving over their waiter to pay.

 

*

 

The way they finally ended came in a way less dramatic fashion than Jamie had anticipated. It wasn’t some huge fight, some crazy revelation or some stranger that he found with Tyler in their bed. Instead, it was a tiresome conversation over dinner one night. One that bore weird similarities to the talk Jamie had had with Sid in that dinner a few weeks before.

 

They were talking about Sid’s and Geno’s upcoming wedding - a small ceremony held in Sully’s enormous garden, with Sully actually officiating the whole thing.

“Crazy that these two idiots beat us to the punch, eh?” Tyler said, in a almost perfect echo of Sid.

Again, Jamie blinked confusedly.

“I mean,” Tyler continued, “they met so shortly ago but when you look at them, you just _know_. I bet people probably say the same stuff about us, right?” He beamed up at Jamie, who was pretty sure that his mouth was hanging open. Tyler’s smile faltered.

“Are you alright?” he asked Jamie.

Jamie cleared his throat and put his knife and fork down.

“You think people think the same about us?

Tyler scrunched up his face.

“I’m sure they are. Why wouldn’t they? We are fucking adorable!”

Usually this would have been the perfect moment for Jamie to smile softly at Tyler and agree with him. But that night, he did not.

 

“Tyler,” Jamie said very slowly. “Do you actually _want_ to get married? Not even to me, but- Would you generally like the idea of being tied to another person for as long as you live? Because honestly, I _don’t_ think you do.”

The second Jamie looked up at Tyler he wished he hadn’t said anything. Tyler was usually like a cloud of cotton candy - albeit a very gorgeous, ripped, tattooed cloud of cotton candy - but now his face looked stormy. His fingers were wrapped around his knife and fork so violently that the knuckles shone white. For one hysterical second, Jamie was sure Tyler would stab him with his cutlery.

 

“What the fuck, Jameson!” Tyler hissed. In the corner, Gerry whined a little in his basket.

“Tyler, I-”

“No.” Tyler said in an icy tone, before setting down his utensils and pushing his plate away. “You don’t get to fucking _talk_ like that to me.”

Jamie swallowed heavily.

“Have you ever even asked me,” Tyler said in a dangerously low voice, “what I think about marriage? Or being with you forever and ever? If I want kids? Or to grow old with you?”

Jamie didn’t say anything. He hadn’t. He just _hadn’t_. He had assumed. But never asked.

“No you didn’t,” Tyler answered for him. “You just decided that I was not in it for the long haul. You still call Gerry ‘your dog’ instead of our’s! You still don’t plan more than a few months ahead. Honestly, if I didn’t know any better, I’d say _you_ are the one who’s not serious about this relationship, not me!”

 

Jamie swallowed again and looked down at his hands. How could Tyler even think that. Of course he was serious about them. Tyler was the best person in the world, his everything. _Of course_ he was serious!

“I see,” Tyler said evenly and Jamie’s eyes snapped up in a panic.

“What?” he blurted out.

“No, it’s fine” Tyler said and his voice cracked ever so slightly. “I’ll get some of my stuff and get out of your hair.”

Jamie felt like he was missing something important, but he couldn’t figure out what it was. He was still frantically replaying their conversation in his head when Tyler came out of their bedroom with a duffle bag and softly called for Gerry, who jumped up immediately.

 

“Tyler, no! What-”

“It’s fine, Jame” Tyler said and clipped on Gerry’s leash. “Don’t drag it out though, okay? I get what you’re saying, even though you’re not really saying anything.”

Jamie opened his mouth and then- It finally clicked.

“No!” he roared so loudly that both Tyler and Gerry flinched. “No, fuck, Tyler! No, I _didn’t_ mean- I just- I thought _you_ don’t really want _me_ , but of c-”

Tyler lifted his hand and closed his eyes for a second.

“Jamie, you just don’t _get_ it. This has never been about me not wanting you. This is _you_ assuming a lot of shit because you still think so little of yourself. And I was willing to work on that with you. Make you see that you are the very best person for me. But I am not willing to work on anything if you also think so little of _me_. That’s- I just can’t-” Tyler’s voice was finally breaking for real. They looked at each other at a loss for words.

“Tyler-” Jamie whispered.

“You just don’t get it” Tyler said and turned to leave.

 

*

 

It’s been nine days now. Nine days during which Jamie has relived every single moment of their relationship. Every kiss, every fuck, every silly conversation about goaltender interference or the perfect partner for the imaginary celebrity threesome of their dreams - they had narrowed it down to Idris Elba or Channing Tatum.

 

He still hasn’t showered and to be honest, he reeks by now. There is a little vomit on the front of his sweater because his stomach is getting as upset as the rest of him. Also he hasn’t really eaten. His sweats are starting to hang a little loose around his frame. At least he has stopped drinking now. Numbing the pain felt too good and Jamie doesn’t deserve good things.

 

He’s lying on their - no, now it’s _his_ couch again - and watches some reruns of Cheers. He has tried calling Tyler exactly 14 times. The last time a tinny voice informed him that Tyler’s mailbox was full. That’s when he stopped. That’s when he threw his phone against the wall in the kitchen. There’s a dent in the wallpaper and his screen is cracked now. Jamie doesn’t fucking care. Why would he need a phone? He’s not planning on leaving his apartment ever again. He hasn’t been at work in ten days.

 

The doorbell rings, but Jamie is too tired to get up and open the door. He hasn’t really slept since Tyler left. He misses Tyler’s warmth, the way Tyler’s feet are always cold and wedged in between Jamie’s calves or his thighs. He can’t sleep without the slight snores that Tyler makes when he’s sleeping. The little snuffling noises he makes when Jamie nudges him awake. Jamie is so so tired. He just wants to stop being conscious.

 

A loud banging on the door makes him flinch violently.

“Jamie! Open the fucking door, I know you’re in there!” calls Sid’s voice through the door. Jamie sighs and buries himself deeper in the couch. He’s been wondering when he would have to deal with this.

“Open up, Jamie! Come on!” Sid shouts. Jamie doesn’t move.

“Jamie, I hate to pull this card, but I _seriously_ need to pee. Please open up!”

Jamie sighs again but finally gets up on wobbly legs. He doesn’t want to talk to Sid, but he can’t let his friend piss himself in the hall.

“Thank _fuck_!” Sid exclaims when Jamie opens the door. He dashes past Jamie into the bathroom and shuts the door behind him.

Jamie goes back to the couch. Maybe he will fall asleep before Sid comes out again and then Sid’s Canadian politeness will make him leave.

 

Jamie should have known we wouldn’t be this lucky. He’s still wide awake when Sid comes out of the bathroom with a relieved sigh.

“Good lord, that was urgent. I had like three big lattes this morning,” he says and sits on the coffee table right in front of Jamie. His eyes sweep over Jamie’s greasy hair, the vomit sweater and the dark circles under Jamie’s eyes.

“So you’re just as miserable as the other one,” he says with a sad little smile.

“Tyler?” Jamie asks with a rasping voice. He hasn’t really spoken in nine days. Just cried himself hoarse. And also screamed into pillows. Yeah, he’s a winner alright.

 

“Of course Tyler,” Sid says with an eye roll. “He’s been moping in our guestroom.”

Sid sighs. Jamie swallows. He wants to ask how Tyler is. What he’s doing and whether he’s been talking about him. But he can’t. Nothing Sid could tell him would make him feel any better.

“Jamie,” Sid says softly. “Please, you guys need to talk. You _clearly_ don’t want this.”

“He doesn’t want to talk to me” Jamie says.

“Of course he does, you idiot” Sid replies impatiently. “He’s been crying since he arrived. And when he cries, Gerry whines. _Loudly_. Geno is just about ready to do unspeakably cruel things to your dog, because he won’t let anyone sleep.”

Jamie lets out a wet chuckle.

 

“What happened?” Sid finally asks.

“Didn’t Tyler tell you?!

Sid shakes his head. “He just said that you broke up with him. And I don’t believe it, so give me your side of the story.”

“I didn’t-” Jamie starts with sudden anger. “I- He was the one-”

“Start at the beginning, dude,” Sid says.

And so Jamie does.

 

When Jamie has finished, his throat aches. He has talked for almost an hour, during which Sid did nothing but listen and nod and get Jamie a blue Gatorade from the fridge. Jamie hadn’t realized how thirsty he was, but by the time he finishes the bottle, he feels definitely less woozy. And sort of hungry. For the first time in days.

“Alright,” Sid says when Jamie finally stops talking. “That’s quite a lot.”

Jamie nods. He suddenly and violently wishes he was alone. He wants to scream into a pillow again. Sid takes the empty plastic bottle from him.

“You’re gonna take a shower now. And I’m gonna make you something to eat. Get up.”

Jamie wants to fight, he really does. But man, he is so fucking tired. And a hot shower sounds perfect, if he’s being honest.

 

Jamie stands under the spray for a long time, brushing his teeth while he’s at it. When he comes out, he finds a fresh set of clothes that Sid must have laid out for him next to the sink. Jamie smiles for the first time in what feels like forever.

“See, that’s a start” Sid says when Jamie walks into the kitchen. He has found pre-cooked pasta and chicken in the freezer and warmed it up for Jamie, the smell of Tyler’s delicious cooking filling the kitchen. Jamie’s throat closes up. He can’t.

He starts crying again.

 

Sid ends up ordering them some pizza and sitting with Jamie until it arrives.

“You can leave if you want to” Jamie tells him.

“Shut the fuck up, you moron” Sid replies.

When the pizza is done, Jamie finds himself nodding off on the couch. Right before he slips into sleep, he can feel a soft blanket being tucked in around him.

“Sleep it off, Jamie” Sid says. “I’ll come back tomorrow.”

 

*

 

Jamie dreams he’s back on the ice at the rink in his hometown. The blades on his skates are freshly sharpened, and he glides over the smooth surface with ease. The stick in his hand has the perfect length, he can control the puck without any problems. There’s nobody else on the ice, just him and the empty net right in front of him. He shoots the puck and nets it easily. Jamie fishes it out of the net and repeats the process a few times. It’s easy and fun, the familiar motions filling him with joy.

 

But after a while, he starts to get bored. It would be so much more fun to play with somebody else. But other people usually stress Jamie out. They tend to not understand him when he mumbles, or they mock him for being chubby or gay. They say he’s stupid. They say he’s dumb as a bag of hair. Only Jordie never mocks him. But Jordie has a girlfriend now and stopped playing hockey. He probably has no time left for his annoying little brother.

 

“Come on, let’s play!” comes a voice to his right and Jamie spins around. There’s a boy his own age on the ice. He has short brown hair and ears that stick out a bit. A huge smile is on his face as he tilts his head a little.

“Who are you?” Jamie asks, although he already knows the answer.

“I’m Tyler, you idiot!” Tyler happily shouts back at you. “Only I am the younger version. From way before we met.”

“But how do I know what you look like as a teenager?” Jamie asks as they take off over the ice.

“You saw a picture on my phone once. And you’re dreaming. Anything is possible when you’re dreaming,” Tyler says and steals the puck from Jamie.

 

They play back and forth for a while. Jamie can’t believe how _well_ they play together. It’s effortless. Like flying, only better.

“I wish this were real” Jamie says. “Maybe in another life, we could have played hockey together. In the NHL!”

Tyler snorts. “Dream on, babe.”

Jamie stops and grabs Tyler’s arm.

“I wish I knew you when we were younger. I could have used a friend like you. Somebody I trust. Somebody I truly love.”

 

“Then why do you push me away so much?” Tyler asks and his voice sounds so fucking sad. “Why don’t you believe me when I tell you I love you and I wanna be with you?”

“Because it’s too good to be true,” Jamie says.

The image of Tyler gets fuzzy around the edges. He gets fainter, like a ghost or a hologram.

“Get your head out of your ass, Jamie,” Tyler says faintly. “The only one standing in the way of us being happy is you. _Seriously_. Don’t fuck this up!”

Jamie wakes up with a huge gasp and promptly falls off the couch.

 

It takes Jamie exactly 17 minutes and 45 seconds to get his butt into some proper clothes, brush his teeth, find his broken phone, his money and his keys and sprint out of the house. He has absolutely no recollection of where he parked his jeep, but it’s already light outside and cars are filling the streets, so he figures there must be a cab to flag down somewhere. He vaguely remembers Sid’s and Geno’s address and hopes a competent cab driver can fill in the blanks.

 

Who is Jamie kidding - he would _run_ the entire damn way, if he wasn’t fairly certain he would die from exhaustion by the end of it before he could even tell Tyler everything he needs to first! Having a dream spell it out for him! Good _lord_ , Jamie’s life is officially a soap opera. He wonders briefly whether or not this would be dramatic enough for Andre and the guys at the club to warrant its own cocktail creation.

 

“Jamie!” somebody shouts from behind him and Jamie whips around, still standing in the middle of the street.

It’s Andre! Who he has _just_ thought of! Jamie opens his mouth to laugh and tell Andre exactly that, but then he realizes that Andre’s face is distorted with horror. And then Jamie feels something rush into him from the side.

His last thought is how beautiful Tyler’s smile was when Jamie put Gerry in his arms the first time. And then there is nothing but darkness.

 

*

 

Jamie’s mouth is made of iron. Iron and dust that fills his airways. His ribcage is made of white hot pain. His head is lined with spikes, driving into his temples and piercing his neck. There is vinegar in his veins and poison in his guts.

Everything hurts so fucking _much_.

 

“Jamie, you fucking idiot” somebody whispers.

And then there are soft lips on his cheekbone and soft, soft fingers tracing his lips, cooling his skin.

They ease the pain. His face feels fine now.

Absolutely fine.

Jamie breathes out and falls back into the dark.

 

*

 

When he finally comes around properly, he slowly opens his eyes to a dimly lit room. The curtains are drawn, but Jamie can make out the brightly lit skyline of downtown in the darkness. Something is beeping rhythmically next to him. He tries turning his head experimentally but stops because it hurts. A _lot_. Like a motherfucker, to use the technical term. He hisses and something stirs on a chair next to the bed he is lying in. Jamie tries to focus his gaze. His head is pounding.

 

It’s Tyler who is sitting curled up in a chair, his head propped up on his arms on Jamie’s mattress. His face is puffy and red, but his eyes are closed and he makes the usual snuffling noises he makes when he’s sleeping. Jamie can feel himself smiling but he has to stop and hiss again when his split lip starts stinging. Tyler stirs again, scrunches up his nose and then blinks himself awake.

 

“ _Ohmifuckinggod_!” he yelps as his eyes travel up to meet Jamie’s. He sort of jumps out of his chair. “You’re awake! Fucking finally!” He slams a button on the bedside table and a light pings on above the door to Jamie’s right.

“Tyler, what-”

“Sshhh,” Tyler interrupts him, smoothing a hand over Jamie’s head and then his cheek. “Don’t speak. You were in an accident. Do you remember?”

Jamie shakes his head carefully. He doesn’t really remember anything, apart from standing on a street, thinking he had to see Tyler as soon as fucking possible. To tell him-

“I love you” Jamie says. “I love you so much, Ty! Please, _please_ take me back! I am so sorry!” He can feel something wet on his face. He must be crying, because Tyler is crying too. But he’s also smiling, his face doing a thousand weird things at once.

 

“I love you too, Jamie. I love you the _most_.” Tyler wipes at his eyes. “But you need to shut the fuck up now until a doctor has looked at you, okay?”

The door opens and bright light from the hallway fills the room. Jamie flinches back and squints. There’s a nurse in the room now and she bustles over.

“So you finally came around, huh?” she says with a small smile. “Thank God, your husband was incredibly worried about you!”

“Hus-” Jamie looks at Tyler a little confused.

Tyler juts his chin out defiantly. The nurse checks something on the beeping machine and then starts doing a lot of weird tests that involve Jamie counting backwards from twenty, answering a few questions and lifting his arms.

“Well, all seems to be in working order,” she tells him cheerily. “I’ll have a doctor check in on you in a little while.” And then she bustles back out, closing the door behind her with a soft snap.

 

Jamie lies there and looks back at Tyler.

“Husband?” he asks.

“They wouldn’t let me see you until I told them we were married,” Tyler says with a little glare. “Which is why I think we should _actually_ get married as soon as possible. Because if you think for _one_ second I will stay away and not be right there by your side when your life is in da-”

“Yes.” Jamie interrupts him.

“Huh?” Tyler says and blinks at him confusedly.

“I agree with you,” Jamie says. He tries to push himself into a sitting position, but Tyler’s hands are on his shoulders in a flash and he presses him back into the pillows.

“Don’t sit.” he says and Jamie stops struggling. Instead he takes Tyler’s hands into his own. There’s a needle in the back of his left hand. Jamie looks down at it.

 

“Did you hear what I said?” he asks Tyler quietly.

Tyler gulps.

“I think we should get married, Ty. Because you are too good to be true. But I am done with standing in the way of our happiness. And I am _done_ thinking you don’t want me. Clearly you do, God knows why. And I’ll take you for as long as I can get you.”

“Fucking hell, Benny,” Tyler croaks out. “Can’t you let me do anything? _I_ wanted to propose to _you_!”

“Beat you to the punch,” Jamie says with a smile.

And then, Tyler leans down to kiss him.

“I’m saying yes, by the way,” he whispers into Jamie’s mouth.

“Damn right you are” Jamie whispers back.

 

*

 

Jamie has a mild concussion, a few stitches above his right eyebrow, a broken hip and some cracked ribs. He also has to wear a neck brace for a week and his entire body is one giant bruise, but all in all - not too bad for someone who has literally been hit by a bus.

“You know,” PK tells him when he comes for a visit in the hospital with most of the other guys from the Glitter Palace, “we were all hoping something would knock sense into you, but we didn’t necessarily think it would need a fucking _bus_!”

Tyler throws the rest of his cookie at him but Jamie laughs. Andre still looks pale and a little frightened.

 

“Burky, come on, I’m _fine_ ” Jamie says for the tenth time. Andre shakes his head.

“That was the fucking worst thing I have ever seen, man!” He exhales shakily and Leon puts his arm around him.

“I know,” Jamie says quietly. “But I’m fine now. And the next time I cross the street, I won’t just stand there like a moron. I promise.”

Andre nods but his lower lip still quivers.

“At least this is all enough drama for at least ten drinks to be named after us,” Tyler adds with a grin and Andre bursts into hysterical sobs, hiding his face in his hands.

“ _Most_ stupid!” Alex admonishes as he pulls Andre out of his chair to wrap him into a bear hug. Geno nods emphatically and glowers at both Tyler and Jamie.

“Maybe let’s talk about something else?” Sid chimes in with faux cheeriness. “Anybody see the Pens game last night? We could talk about their defense.”

Everyone groans.

 

Jamie gets to go home a few days later. He parks it on the couch with Gerry warming his one side and Tyler usually curled protectively around his other.

“I will get so fucking fat” he sighs when Tyler brings him another plate laden with awesome, delicious food.

“Good,” Tyler replies with satisfaction. “The more of you, the better.”

“Didn’t know you were a feeder, Seggy,” Jamie grins. “That’s a bit creepy.”

“Yeah well, you didn’t know a _lot_ of things,” Tyler shoots back.

And - well, he has a point there.

 

Jamie doesn’t get fat. Not much at least. And even if he did, he wouldn’t care. Because for the first time in forever, he doesn’t re-think or doubt his own happiness. He just enjoys it. Even though Jamie would never admit it, PK was probably right about that bus knocking some sense into him. That’s why he doesn’t whine during his 20 hours of sports rehab. Why he doesn’t complain about doing ridiculous exercises to stretch out his hip muscles. He might have a few screws in his hip bone and some new scars to join his old hockey injuries but he also has got some perspective now. He knows what’s important and what isn’t.

Doubting himself and doubting Tyler definitely belong in the second category.

 

A day before Sid’s and Geno’s wedding, Jamie passes the last examination by his superstrict doctor.

“Alright, make sure to stretch out your hips daily. If you do that, you should be good as new in no time!” she says with a last look at her clipboard.

When they shake hands, Jamie could swear he can see the smallest of smiles on her lips.

 

“You clean up nicely!” Tyler tells him, when Jamie comes out of their bedroom in his best suit the day of the wedding. He lets out a low whistle and Jamie grins.

“Not too shabby yourself” he replies with an appreciative gaze up and down Tyler’s slender frame.

“Well,” Tyler says, wrapping his arms around Jamie’s neck, “we’re just a very handsome couple, let’s leave it at that.” And then he kisses Jamie with far more heat than any of their kisses since before their break up and then Jamie’s accident.

 

In fact it gets heated so quickly that Jamie has to pull the emergency breaks.

“Ty,” he pants into Tyler’s neck, “we have to leave in, like, four minutes.”

“I can do a _lot_ in four minutes,” Tyler mumbles in between kisses to Jamie’s jawline.

“I know” Jamie grins. “But I’d rather take my time with you later.” He has slipped into a suggestive low purr and Tyler actually shivers in his arms.

“Fucking hell, Benny,” he answers petulantly while unwrapping himself from Jamie’s arms. “Way to make sure I’m running around with an awkward boner all day.”

“It’s what I do best” Jamie says and slaps Tyler on the butt as he picks up the car keys.

 

The wedding is absolutely beautiful. The staff from the Glitter Palace have turned Sully’s garden into a sea of flowers. There are rows of small, white wooden chairs on the lawn, all facing a white flowery arch.

“None of Sully’s daughters want to get married” Gabe tells them, grinning wildly. “Poor Sully had to let all his wedding crazy out for this one.”

“It’s- it’s really pretty,” Leon says while looking around wide-eyed and a little wistful. Jamie can just about hold in the little snort that has threatened to come out of his mouth. He catches the eye of Connor, the regular from the Glitter Palace with the massive crush on Leon. He’s Leon’s date for the day and trying to hide a grin, but he also looks kinda thoughtful.

“If Sid is throwing the bouquet tonight, my money is on Leon,” Jamie tells Alex out of the corner of his mouth.

“Wanna bet?” Alex says. There is a maniacal gleam in his eye. He actually _might_ have a gambling problem after all, Jamie thinks before shaking his head with a laugh and walking away.

 

The ceremony itself is pretty short. Sully officiates, while a guy called Flower acts as Sid’s best man. Alex is flanking Geno. Most guests are employees or former employees from the Palace. Jamie can see Chara with his heavily pregnant wife, their old DJ Phil the Thrill and even a few regulars. Geno’s parents aren’t there, but an older couple sits in the front row of Sid’s side of chairs. Next to them is Taylor, Sid’s younger sister, who Jamie has met on a few occasions. She is wearing a bright rainbow tulle dress and flowers in her hair. Most of the handful of straight, single guys at the event ogle her openly.

 

“In hockey,” Sully says standing underneath the flower arch, “when a team is faced with adversity, the best course of action is to simplify things. In my mind, the same goes for any successful couple.”

Tyler giggles into Jamie’s shoulder before Jamie wraps an arm around him and presses a kiss into his hair.

“Figures he would talk about hockey,” Tyler whispers and Jamie grins.

“Simplifying means - let the unimportant shit go. Do you love each other? Do you want the same things in life? Great, then everything else is just unimportant noise.”

There are a few sniffs here and there in the audience.

“You two love each other very much. You also want a _shocking_ amount of the exact same stuff,” Sully continues. “Everything else - who did the dishes and who always leaves their socks on the floor - that is just unimportant bullshit. Make sure you know just _how_ much you love each other. The rest will fall into place.”

 

*

 

It’s almost four in the morning when Jamie and Tyler stumble into their hallway. Their neighbor has graciously agreed to keep Gerry until the next morning, so they don’t even have to be quiet.

“Man, that was some wedding” Tyler giggles as he tries to take off his shoes. They are both very tipsy.

Jamie nods in agreement. It really was great. After the ceremony, everybody had gotten drunk on champagne, ate their own body weight in prawns and steak and then danced until their feet hurt too much to stand upright. Kappy, Willy, Andre, Mike, Tom and Mitch had done some boyband dance routine while Auston manned the dj booth. Jamie was pretty sure that he pulled something from laughing so hard.

 

They had also finally met Alex’s and Nicky’s brand new baby daughter, Ella.

“Most pretty girl in the world” Alex had cooed, while Nicky looked on wistfully.

Tyler had pulled on Jamie’s sleeve and then whispered into his ear “Just so you know, I want at _least_ three kids who are as cute as her.”

Jamie had not let go of Tyler’s hand for the rest of the night.

 

Of course it wouldn’t have been a true Glitter Palace event without anybody getting caught doing something frisky. This time it was Gabe and Mikko who had chosen a quieter corner of the garden to grope each other. Sid’s nana had to down two glasses of whiskey after walking in on them, while a clearly horrified Sid hovered beside her, apologizing over and over again and shooting Gabe and Mikko withering looks.

“Oh dear, stop fussing,” Nana Crosby eventually said. “It reminds me of me and your gram-gram when we were younger.” She giggled as Sidney blushed so violently he almost looked purple.

The whole evening got to a whole new level of uncomfortable after  _that_.

 

After a gazillion tearful toasts, some grinding on the dancefloor and the cutting of an enormous golden and black wedding cake, Tyler and Jamie had finally called an uber home.

“Let’s get to the fun part of the night,” Tyler now croons as he sways over to Jamie. “I have been waiting for _hours_!”

Tyler’s bedroom eyes are so intense, he almost looks cross-eyed. Jamie has to burst out into a loud giggle before wrapping Tyler up in his arms and kissing the living bejeezus out of him.

“I love you” he tells Tyler.

“I love you too” Tyler answers. “Now take me to bed and raw me until I can’t walk anymore!”

“The things I do for you,” Jamie says with a mock sigh.

 

It’s amazing, Jamie thinks as they get naked and on the bed, that they have had sex hundreds of times, and still this is more incredible to him than anything other in life. The way Tyler’s tongue feels gliding along his own. The way Tyler’s breath hitches as Jamie pulls him closer. The way they move totally in sync while also being very, _very_ turned on.

“Get the lube,” Tyler moans as Jamie starts nosing at Tyler’s balls.

 

He opens Tyler up slowly, first easing one finger in, then another. Tyler is already panting heavily, restlessly clenching his fists in the sheets. They are both hard, Jamie painfully so, and there is a small dribble of precum leaking from Tyler’s dick.

“Fuck, Jamie,” Tyler sighs. "Hurry the fuck up, I need you in me right _now_.”

Jamie takes a few steadying breaths before carefully pulling his fingers out of Tyler, toying with the rim for a second. Tyler bites his lip but the tiniest little moan still slips out.

 

Jamie puts a little more lube on his own dick and gives himself a few tugs before lining up.

“We good?” he asks.

Tyler nods. “Get it the fuck in me!”

Jamie pushes in slowly, agonizingly slowly and listens to Tyler’s hitching groans until he bottoms out.

“Gimme a sec,” Tyler whispers.

Jamie leans down to kiss him, licking into Tyler’s sweet mouth and nipping playfully at Tyler’s lips until Tyler is fully hard again.

“Alright?” he murmurs.

“ _Fuck me_ ,” Tyler answers.

 

Jamie picks a slow rhythm at first, carefully pushing in and pulling almost all the way out again. Tyler moans, his eyes closed and his head thrown back. Then Jamie nudges Tyler’s legs around himself, the angle changes and all of a sudden Tyler gets frantic.

“Fuck, fuck, Jamie, right _there_! Oh God, harder. Fuck me _harder_!” he shouts and pulls Jamie further down.

Jamie does his best to keep the rhythm even and measured but soon they are humping each other like crazy people, Tyler swearing a blue streak and Jamie desperately thinking of supergross things in order to not shoot his load too soon. He wants Tyler to come first. He _needs_ Tyler to come first.

 

“Come on, baby,” he murmurs into Tyler’s ear and Tyler sobs. “Come for me. Clench that tight little hole around me and _come_.”

Tyler comes with Jamie’s name on his lips and Jamie’s mouth latched to his neck.

“Fuck,” Jamie croaks and then pushes hard and fast into the heat of Tyler, chasing after his orgasm and finding he was already on the edge of it all along. All he has to do is let go. He does and everything goes down in a swirl of color and ecstasy.

 

They laze around in their afterglow, while the sky outside goes from black to deep blue to orange. Tyler’s head is pillowed on Jamie’s chest and Jamie’s hand is in Tyler’s hair. They are a mess, the sheets are a mess and Jamie couldn’t give less of a fuck. This is where he wants to be, now and forever. With Tyler by his side and blissed out from fucking.

“You know what arrived in the mail today?” Tyler asks.

“Hmm?” Jamie replies, closing his eyes. Sleep seems like a very good idea right about now.

“Our marriage license,” Tyler says and props his chin up on Jamie’s chest. “So how do you want to do this?”

Jamie opens his eyes again and looks at Tyler. The early morning light makes him look etheral, almost unreal.

“Honestly,” Jamie says, “I don’t care. I just want to be married to you, I don’t care about the wedding.”

Tyler smiles softly.

 

“You just don’t want to dance in front of people, admit it!”

“Do you know how much shit Jordie and Jenny would give me if we danced to ‘Candy Man’ by Christina Aguilera?” Jamie asks with a heaving sigh.

Tyler giggles and presses a quick kiss to Jamie’s chest.

“Well, Mr. Party Pooper, if you don’t want a big ceremony - what are you doing later today?”

Jamie lifts his head in surprise.

“What are you saying?”

Tyler grins a little wickedly. “I am saying that we don’t have any plans this afternoon. How about we just go down to the court house. You, me and Gerry. We get married, then I’ll take you to that pizza place where we had our first date and then we go home, lie on the couch, drink champagne from the bottle and watch a hockey game.”

Jamie blinks at Tyler for a few seconds before lifting his hand and letting his fingers drift over Tyler’s handsome, lovely, wonderful face.

“That sounds like the best plan ever, babe,” he whispers with a smile.

“I know,” Tyler whispers back. “And after that, we can have boring-old-married-couple-sex for the first time.”

Jamie snorts. “I doubt that anything ever gets boring with you.”

“Well, Jamie, what can I say?” Tyler says with the hugest grin on his face, “You really have my number.”

 

He does. He is the luckiest man in the world and he does.

 

 

***

Come yell hockey at me over at [tumblr](https://jiggyknowswhatsup.tumblr.com).


End file.
